Wednesday, January 14, 2009

A Kinder, Gentler Pregnancy Test

Expanding on thoughts from yesterday...

I have a love-hate relationship with the Clearblue Easy Digital Pregnancy Test. I did get a positive once and there is nothing like seeing that word "Pregnant" in the little digital read out. No analysis, no maybe, no guessing...you are pregnant. (I assure you, I *did* see it once. It's not a myth!)

However this has not been my experience as a rule. Usually I am anxiously staring at that little spinning hour glass, sometimes not even blinking, until "Not Pregnant" flashes onto the screen. I find it so jarring, so harsh, so........final. Here are some other kinder, gentler, suggestions...

Maybe a message of hope and encouragement...

Or suggestions for killing another childless evening with no responsibilities...

Perhaps advice for playing the lottery...


Or maybe just some compliments to make you feel better about yourself...





A little cross-merchandising might be nice...



What do you think? I'd buy it...

23 comments:

Betty Rubble said...

How about one that says "PREGNANT and you WILL stay that way this time"

Can we both get one of those??? Please!

'Murgdan' said...

Bwahahahaha! I'll take the "Drink Up" one please. These sticks aren't good for anything else. (I still think 'pregnant' is just a myth')

Caroline said...

I loved your pregnancy sticks. Where can I buy them?

Erin said...

Those are fantastic, Megan. I hate those F-ing sticks. Seeing "PREGNANT" is just breathtaking. Hoping someone here in the blogosphere sees that soon (like in this lifetime, perhaps).

Michelle said...

This just cracked me up. I so needed this. I would so buy those!

April said...

this was great comic relief for me :)

Cassandra said...

Brilliant!

But they'd need to market different versions for infertile and "hope I'm not knocked up" consumers. "You're so pretty" might confuse the teenage girls even more than one line versus two.

Stacey said...

Thanks for the laugh! I absolutely love this idea - especially the idea of redeeming something you'd peed on for food. :) Priceless!

Chelle said...

LOL! I'd totally buy it!

Abbie said...

I would SO buy a box of those pregnancy tests! You need to get into that business!

Sarah said...

Oh yes, I'd buy that kind of test! lol.

Thanks for reading. =)

Mary said...

You are a riot! My stomach hurts from laughing so hard.

Kristin said...

those are so funny! so clever!!

Andrea said...

lol, I love it! Or, they could just say 'haha, yeah right' or 'screw your dreams' that would work too:)

Tara said...

HAHAHA! How about one that says Ice cold tequila shot - coming right up!!!

You are too funny! Thanks for the laugh :)

Laura said...

OMG! That is way too humorous! I'm hoping you get your "PREGNANT" soon.

musicmakermomma said...

Those are really excellent - sort of fortune cookies you pee on. You could also have "20% off your next gross of pregnancy test sticks"! Possibilities are endless.

areyoukiddingme said...

Excellent idea! Now you just need to get Proctor & Gamble on board.

Malky B. said...

Very funny. I wouldn't mind one of those responses instead of "not pregnant". At least you would feel slightly less lousy.

The Lonely Scrapbooker said...

Hilarious. This needs to win some type of "best infertility humour" award or something. It's great that you've kept your wit(s) about you through all this. Not many of us can see a lighter side of this whole drama.

Sarah said...

hahah LOVE this entry! I just wrote one recently about the digital tests...and some of our wording is exactly the same almost! I HATE the finality of digital! Unless, of course I turn up preggo :-) Cake and eat it too.

How about one that says " You're preggo! I'll pause for a minute while you go get your camera."

Or an evil one...

" Not pregnant. LMAO. Give it a rest, lady."

Clearblue should invest in your products :-)

Frenchie said...

How about if Magic 8 Ball and Clear Blue Easy come up with a product together. Then if you didn't like the first result to pop up in the window, you could give it a little shake and see what is says next....like, 'not likely'. (That seems less harsh, than NOT PREGNANT, right?

PurpleDogMommy said...

This...cracked me up. I sincerely hope you get your sticky BFP, very very soon.

Related Posts Widget for Blogs by LinkWithin