Friday, October 9, 2009

IVF Anonymous

EIGHTEEN QUESTIONS*

  1. Did you ever lose time from work or school due to IVF?
  2. Has IVF ever made your home life unhappy?
  3. Did IVF affect your reputation?
  4. Have you ever felt remorse after IVF?
  5. Did IVF cause a decrease in your ambition or efficiency?
  6. After losing did you feel you must return as soon as possible to cycle again?
  7. Did you often IVF cycle until your last dollar was gone?
  8. Did you ever borrow to finance your IVF?
  9. Have you ever sold anything to finance IVF?
  10. Were you reluctant to use "IVF money" for normal expenditures?
  11. Did IVF make you careless of the welfare of yourself or your family?
  12. Did you ever cycled longer than you had planned?
  13. Have you ever cycled to escape worry, trouble, boredom or loneliness?
  14. Have you ever committed, or considered committing, an illegal act to finance IVF?
  15. Did IVF cause you to have difficulty in sleeping?
  16. Do arguments, disappointments or frustrations create within you an urge to cycle?
  17. Did you ever have an urge to celebrate any good fortune by a few hours of IVF?
  18. Have you ever considered self destruction or suicide as a result of your IVF?

Most compulsive IVFers will answer yes to at least seven of these questions.

*adapted from a gambling addiction site as a (sort of) joke.

13 comments:

areyoukiddingme said...

Is there a twelve step program available?

SassyIfLady said...

Wow - I may have answered yes to more than 7 - :-)

JB said...

I believe numbers 14 and 17 to be my favorites...combine a celebratory rampage (a la knocking off a 7-11) with procuring funds for the next cycle...hmmm...wheels turning...

Mo and Will said...

Oh my God. I have to admit that I have become powerless over IVF and my life has become unmanageable! I am Mo and I'm an IVF-aholic. Yikes!

Awesome post!

Betty Rubble said...

Funny! I love it! Then it is sadly true the lengths I have thought I would be willing to go to "IVF"...

womb for improvement said...

The first step to recovering is admitting you have a problem!

Lorza said...

Mine would be a big fat negative ghost rider. I wish. Not applicable. Sigh. Maybe one day.

Frau said...

The really depressing part about this is that it continues to rule your life even after you quit.

Every now and then I wonder if they'll come up with a drug to fix just plain wonky ovaries in the future.

Mad Hatter said...

Well done! Replace IF with IVF and I am totally there! I can only live vicariously through the IVF of others at the moment! ;-) When's the next meeting?

Amy said...

That was hysterical!

Alison said...

I'm powerless too! I love it!

I gave you a blog award . . . check out my blog for more info!

strongblonde said...

lol! this points to the addictive nature of IF! i remember being obsessed with EVERYTHING! :)

xoxo

PJ said...

Um... yes, repeatedly!

Too funny! Yet kinda sad.

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