Where are my, "What About Bob?" fans? When we were little, if my sister and I liked a movie it went into hardcore frequent rotation at our house. We loved, "What About Bob?"
And "Dirty Dancing".
And "Haunted Honeymoon"
And "Money Pit"
And "Back to the Future"
I can still quote these movies. So if you are a fan of "What About Bob?" then you know all about Baby Steps the book. (For those who are not familiar with the movie, the concept is focus on one step at a time. Don't get overwhelmed.)
Before this last IVF attempt I had "big plans" for my child free life. I had fleshed out these "big plans" so much that I fully expected that if the cycle failed I was poised like a cat, ready to pounce. I fully expected to go into "big plan" activation mode.
But I have not been pouncing. I haven't been activating. Instead I've been baby stepping. (I'll spare you the obvious comments about the irony of baby stepping without any chance of an actual baby in the future.)
That brings me to today's baby step. Generally my level of depression is directly proportional to the length of my leg hair. Judging by the looks of my legs, I have been in quite a funk. I had not shaved my legs since my last cycle. And my attempts at shaving during my last cycle were half hearted at best; just enough grooming so as not to be a topic of conversation with the nurses.
But today I am leg hair free! And as I sat in the bathtub shaving my legs I felt good. I felt better. I started thinking about all the other things I could do today. I could pack up my second set of china and send it to storage. I could clean out the closets for the open house tomorrow. I could get back into my sewing room. I could go to the mall and buy some new cardigans to replace the worn ones I've been wearing lately. I could go to Target and buy some sea monkeys*.
But I didn't do any of that stuff. I just shaved my legs. Well, that and pulled out some empty boxes in an attempt to start packing.
Oh well, baby steps. I wonder what I'll do tomorrow?
*My new best friend at work has this sea monkey kit and I want to get one!